Shibboleth Developers

[Tom Scavo <>]

Document: draft-mace-shibboleth-arch-protocols-02

[line 1] Misspelled "Architecture"

[line 74] The phrase "destination-site-first" uses old terminology. 
Should this be called "service-provider-first"?

[lines 114--115] Delete the phrase "also based on SAML" for clarity. 
If you want to emphasize the fact that Liberty is based on SAML,
rewrite the sentence.

[line 134] Cross reference missing

[line 143] Insert space between "MAY" and "choose"

[line 186] Cross reference missing

[line 308] Redundant namespace attribute

[line 400] Subsections on browser/artifact profile pending

[line 419] Redundant namespace attribute

[line 440] Redundant namespace attribute

[line 512] Replace "Profile" with "Specification" and start a new section

[line 517] Replace "a profile of this specification" with "a subset of
the SAML 2.0 metadata specification"

[line 519] Replace "profile" with "specification"

[line 563] Isn't the identifier containing "artifact-01" deprecated?

[line 587] Replace "my" with "by"

[line 605] Misspelled "facilitating"

[line 614] Insert comma after "i.e."


General comments:

- Applicable Shibboleth version is not mentioned anywhere in this
document (intentionally, I presume, but it's still a significant
omission)

- In Example 3.1.1.3, remove the URL encoding for clarity

- In Examples 3.1.2.1, 3.2.1.1, and 3.2.2.1, insert indentation for
clarity.  Also, refrain from using default and/or redundant
namespaces.

- Not sure sections 3.3 through 3.7 should be called "profiles"

- Combine sections 3.3 through 3.5

- IMHO, section 3.6 should be omitted.  As written, it adds nothing to
the existing SAML2 "profile", which itself is vague at best. 
Moreover, there seems to be a lot of overlap between the IdP Discovery
Profile and the WAYF.  Perhaps the two should be combined?

PS. I volunteer to rewrite Examples 3.1.2.1, 3.2.1.1, and 3.2.2.1.  :-)